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Managing the Child's Fears

Itisimportanttofindoutthereasonsbehindchildren’sfearinordertomanagethem.Mostoftheparentsthinkthatchildrenwilloutgrowfearwhentheygrow-up,butitisamusttoresolvesuchchildhoodfears.Copingwithfearsandanxietiesiscommonduringchildhood.Certainfearsandanxietiescanleaveadeepimpactonthegrowthanddevelopmentofchildren.Therefore,parentsmustplayanimportantroleinhelpingchildrendealwithfearsandanxieties.Letustakealookatthecommonconcernsofparentsonmanagingtheirchildren’sfearsandwhatparentscandoaboutit.InthisarticleMychildsfearsseemirrationalFearofGhostsandMonsterFearofDarkFearofThunderandStormFearofStrangersOtherFearsHowdoIdealwithmychildsfears?MychildsfearsseemirrationalYourchildisverylikelytodisplayinsecuritiesandfearsthatmayseemincomprehensibletoyou.Youcannotunderstandwhyyourchildshouldclingtoyoujustbeforeyouleavehome,afraidthatyouwillnotreturn.Youcanunderstandifyourchildisafraidofthunder,butwhyshouldshebeterrifiedofdogs?Itisnotimportantthatyoucomprehendthebasisofyourchildsfears.Whethertheirfearsseemrationalorirrational,youmustrememberthatthesefearsareveryrealtoyourchild.Whatkindsoffearsarecommoninchildren?Herearesomeofthecommonfearsinchildren.FearofGhostsandMonsterManychildrenfearghostsandmonsters.Theyfeelthattheghostsandmonstersarearoundthem.Theygetthiskindoffearmainlyduringnightorwhentheyareinadarkroom.Sometimestheyfearthatghostsandmonstersarehidingundertheirbedorintheircupboard.Insuchsituationsparentsmustreassurethemandtellthemsuchthingsdonotexist.FearofDarkFearofdarkisoneofthecommonfearsinchildrenandbecauseofwhichtheyfearsleepingaloneintheirrooms.Insuchsituationsyoucangivecompanytoyourchilduntilsheisasleep.Installingadimlightinherroomisalsoagoodoption.Teachhertoprayatnightbeforegoingtobed,thiswillhelptodevelopstrengthinherinordertofightthefear.FearofThunderandStormMostofthechildrengetscaredwhentheyhearthesoundofthunderandstorm.Theythinkthatsomesupernaturalpowersarecreatingit.Insuchsituation,youmustreassureherandtellherthescientificreasonbehindthunder,stormandlightening.FearofStrangersChildrenfeelscaredofstrangersbecausetheyfeelthattheyaregoingtotakethemawayfromtheirparents.Herewearetalkingaboutyourfriendsandrelativeswhocanbestrangerstoyourchild.Thiskindoffearisdevelopedmainlyinchildrenwhoareantisocial.Ifyourchildiscopingwithsuchkindoffearitisnecessarytoboosthersocialskill.Encourageyourchildtointeractwithotherchildren.Enrolherinsomehobbyclasseswhereshecanmeetnewchildrenandteachers.Followingsuchwayscanhelptoenhancehersocialskillstherebyreducingthefearofstrangers.OtherFearsHaveaquicklookatthelistofotherfearsinchildren.FearofseparationfromparentsFearofdoctorsandinjectionsFearofinsectsFearofschoolteacherFearoftoiletFearofbathroomFearofdomesticanimalslikecatsanddogsHowdoIdealwithmychildsfears?Youneedtohandlethemgentlyandsympathetically.Sheneedsyourhelptocope.Makingfunofherorbeingdismissiveofherfearswillworsenthesituationandmakeherfeelisolated.Youmustexplaintoherthatthereisnoneedtobefrightened,butthatyouunderstandifsheis.Yourreassurancecanbethegreatestweaponforyourchildtofightwithherfears.Alwaysreassureherwhenshegetsfrightenedanddonotleaveheralonewhensheisscared.

Coping with fears and anxieties is common during childhood. Certain fears and anxieties can leave a deep impact on the growth and development of children. Therefore, parents must play an important role in helping children deal with fears and anxieties. Let us take a look at the common concerns of parents on managing their children’s fears and what parents can do about it.

My child's fears seem irrational

Your child is very likely to display insecurities and fears that may seem incomprehensible to you. You cannot understand why your child should cling to you just before you leave home, afraid that you will not return. You can understand if your child is afraid of thunder, but why should she be terrified of dogs? It is not important that you comprehend the basis of your child's fears. Whether their fears seem rational or irrational, you must remember that these fears are very real to your child.

What kinds of fears are common in children?

Here are some of the common fears in children.

Fear of Ghosts and Monster

Many children fear ghosts and monsters. They feel that the ghosts and monsters are around them. They get this kind of fear mainly during night or when they are in a dark room. Sometimes they fear that ghosts and monsters are hiding under their bed or in their cupboard. In such situations parents must reassure them and tell them such things do not exist.

Fear of Dark

Fear of dark is one of the common fears in children and because of which they fear sleeping alone in their rooms. In such situations you can give company to your child until she is asleep. Installing a dim light in her room is also a good option. Teach her to pray at night before going to bed, this will help to develop strength in her in order to fight the fear.

Fear of Thunder and Storm

Most of the children get scared when they hear the sound of thunder and storm. They think that some supernatural powers are creating it. In such situation, you must reassure her and tell her the scientific reason behind thunder, storm and lightening.

Fear of Strangers

Children feel scared of strangers because they feel that they are going to take them away from their parents. Here we are talking about your friends and relatives who can be strangers to your child. This kind of fear is developed mainly in children who are antisocial. If your child is coping with such kind of fear it is necessary to boost her social skill. Encourage your child to interact with other children. Enrol her in some hobby classes where she can meet new children and teachers. Following such ways can help to enhance her social skills thereby reducing the fear of strangers.

Other Fears

Have a quick look at the list of other fears in children.

Fear of separation from parents

Fear of doctors and injections

Fear of insects

Fear of school teacher

Fear of toilet

Fear of bathroom

Fear of domestic animals like cats and dogs

How do I deal with my child's fears?

You need to handle them gently and sympathetically. She needs your help to cope. Making fun of her or being dismissive of her fears will worsen the situation and make her feel isolated. You must explain to her that there is no need to be frightened, but that you understand if she is.

Your reassurance can be the greatest weapon for your child to fight with her fears. Always reassure her when she gets frightened and do not leave her alone when she is scared.

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8 Comments

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Amrit.14 years ago

by what age do children start understanding their individualiy?

Aditi Verma.14 years ago

my parenting,
its been a long time since i accessed your site. it is so good to be a subscriber of your website. as of now, i am dealing with a problem that is common in most of the kids. i am a parent of a three and a half year old daughter. her name is tanishi(bulbul). she is a brilliant kid. if i say she is well versed in most of the rhymes, can operate computer on her own(from booting to shut it down), sounds made by various kinds of animals, name of the months, name of the weekdays, her observation is also profound , extracting the exact medicine to be given to her grandmother, etc. now these are the traits that are common in any toddler that we can come in contact with (well, its all due to the exposure that they have). we try to relate her to everything that the children of her age should know. in spite of everything she is a very shy child- shy to the extent of being timid. she is very jovial in the homely atmosphere, even outgoing, but when it comes to interacting with a stranger or any newcomer she becomes very reticent. how can we as her parents help her overcome this timid ness? is it reflective of any flaw in the mannerism that we are bringing her up in? she chews her nails a lot. how can i help her in abandoning this habit? please let me know your views regarding my concerns.
thank you,
aditi.

Tanvi Vivek Sonkusare.14 years ago

tanvi is 2 and half years old, she is going for tution from 1st of june 2005. her date of birth is 05.10.2002. in tution class she is going to write a b c d to z. now my question is can i allow to teacher for writing my daughter to write a b c d because my dauther is very small, i think she is not able to write anythink, can we allow to write any

pati.14 years ago

very intresting.
haven't got milestone in each development areas.like they have in other sites.

paru.14 years ago

its very good.my 2year old son is feared with fire or pataka wht should i do plz help